Archive for the ‘satire’ Category
In the week we learn that Ryanair CEO Michael O’Leary’s proposition to charge people a pound for using the toilet on Ryanair planes is not meant as a joke, sick or otherwise, these new passenger instructions strike a chord…
* Brevity is the soul of lingerie.
* Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words.
* You can’t teach an old dogma new tricks.
* You can lead a horticulture, but you can’t make her think.
* She runs the gamut of emotions from A to B.
* If you want to know what God thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to.
* Salary is no object – I want only enough to keep body and soul apart.
* Take care of luxuries and the necessities will take care of themselves.
* This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force.
* I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.
* All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends.
* It serves me right for keeping all my eggs in one bastard.
* That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.
* I don’t care what is written about me, so long as it isn’t true.
And, to celebrate the 40th anniversary this month of the Prague Spring, a little mash-up:
* The two most beautiful words in the English language are “cheque enclosed”. The two most beautiful words in the Czech language are “Czech freed”.